She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
