Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
