Will you blow on my dice?
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
