You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
