nut hugger
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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