worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize