Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
