first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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