i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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