Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Randomize
