I just threw up on my dentist
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
