I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
