a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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