why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
