i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
