I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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