I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
