i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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