I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
