I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
dude i'm inner monologue high
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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