Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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