chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
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