just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Randomize
