Only a mothe r could love this liver
its not stalking. its research.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
