ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
