So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize
