... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize