This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Randomize