she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
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