Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
