Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I just had sex on a roof
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
