if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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