He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
