Have you finally orgasmed yet?
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
the room spins SO much faster in panama
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
