fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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