this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize