it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
