He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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