Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
