but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
