the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
