I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
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