a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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