White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
