S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
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