I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
