I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
