I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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