Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
