You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
